Hurt Me!

Archival Note: I’m posting this to meet an archival need, as between the old Omega Complex and the new, all did not survive. As it happens, links in the outside world point to this article, which in turn points to the ‘Puppeteer’ card I designed for the Mandatory Bonus Fun Card Game. I’m not one to stand in the way of this kind of detail – and to render this article Unhistory would likely get me in trouble with the authorities.

I found an odd little quirk of the PARANOIA Mandatory Bonus Fun Card Game that doesn’t quite justify a whole article (just yet!). Treason lies at the heart of the game – as it affects the status of each Troubleshooter. You can shoot a Traitor with impunity, but attacking Loyal citizens is bad. One mission – Go ‘Outdoors’ – requires you to sustain damage to benefit, in this case gaining a Security Clearance. The mission, as a result, tends to become bloodless, each player suddenly losing interest in just shooting you, traitor or not.

Now, the rules clearly state that damaging Computer property – like loyal clones – is bad… however, it then clearly states that you receive 2 Treason tokens for damaging another Troubleshooter. Apparently, your personal value to The Computer doesn’t matter quite so much. So, you can Wound yourself without sustaining Treason damage and look forward to the prospect of a promotion at the end of the mission. Ideally, thin your hand of any cards you can’t Play Anytime, retaining a weapon and as many Cancel cards as you can – like New Improved Treasonous Activity List and Bribe (don’t use something like Better Idea, because you’ll end up with an extra card by default, which you want to avoid). Play the weapon to Wound yourself, then cancel any responses from the rest of the team that might try to stop you. If no one stops you, use the Play Anytime cancel cards as rapidly as possible on the next Troubleshooter’s turn to empty your hand and end the mission.

You might consider trying an alternate approach to this by using Puppeteer. If another player tries to hurt himself using the method already outlined above, bide your time until other team members have played all their Cancel cards… then, assuming the Wound remains, Puppeteer it onto your own Troubleshooter. Then Cancel off any attempts to stop the play. Voila… a Security Clearance increase without all the treason nonsense normally associated with damaging Computer property.

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